Only during the holidays…during the holidays I think of my family…I lost 4 members of my family within 10 years…my dad past away on Christmas morning and my mom buried 4 of my brothers, I’m the only one to make it past 40yrs.old…one of my brothers past away 12.18.2006, one has a birthday on new years day…
I tell everyone that I don’t do holidays/birthdays…I so I’m glad that the holiday season is over…Every new year I pick myself up and say ok, its history now and I feel normal until the next holiday season…
I know for a fact my family members wouldn’t want me to feel depressed and that they would want me to embrace/enjoy life, which I have…
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Prolonged anxiety creates depression, it also shuts off the sex drive as you are in a low level fight or flight experience.
Your body does not need to feel horny if you are trying to escape from something that wants to eat you like when we were hunter gatherers and not at the top of the food chain back then.
It’s your bodies response to prolonged anxiety producing higher levels of adrenaline and cortisone.
That’s why there is a population boom after a war, because everyone starts to relax more and the sex drive is switched on again.
Same thing applies to erectile disfunction with men, if you have an unconscious anxiety about sex ( it’s a bit more complex than just sex, but what your unconscious mind considers to be similar or the same as sex ) It puts the brakes on testosterne release in men and shuts down the sex drive. Poor body health also has an effect, as well as prescription medications for blood pressure.
Which is why if you use things like weed or shrooms, it helps to lower inhibitions and or anxiety, and your sex drive will increase temporarily.
Rebalancing the parasympathetic nervous system takes you out of this state. This can be done with shrooms and weed, the Wimm Hoff breathing technique works well also but it takes time if you have been in a low or high level anxiety state for a while.
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Don’t know what exactly they are testing. I mentioned the testosterone thing and he said sure, we can test it.
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They’re probably not testing thyroid function then. I honestly don’t know what to say about the whole thyroid testing/medication. Kinda like a to each their own thing. Positive vibes you figure it out. 
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Thank you everyone for those kind words. Phil that is brutal damn, I don’t know what to say one of the worst things I’ve heard. This thread should have a disclaimer that there are a lot of things like that in here from peoples’ lives. Most of my family members are alive. And I’m on this blood pressure medicine I never knew that very interesting. I was living a very stressful dangerous life and started feeling bad and checked my blood pressure at walmart (pre apocalypse) and it was in the red. So I started the blood pressure meds and its normal again, no idea why it went up and won’t come down without it but I thought taking them was fine. My friend told me something about someone they knew who got off of them by switching to grape seed oil, but I don’t know if I believe that and don’t have a reliable blood pressure cuff. I bought one on ebay and it always reads high on everyone haha.
I’ve lost a few friends that were important but the worst loss I had were my grandparents. I was in high school and started drinking a lot for I guess 15 years and then stopped in 2014.
Not trying to tell people what to do but maybe if you have some of these type problems don’t drink. I was getting to the point where my body was rejecting alcohol and I would hurl after one drink, my brain’s way of protecting itself. I never got a DUI but I did go to jail for drunk in public when I was 19 very shitty time. Didn’t learn anything from it but how to buy drugs from the other jail dummies.
Alcohol is one of the worst drugs that exists. I always thought if I stopped drinking I would lose all this weight and be smarter and all this hahaha nothing happened like that. Instead all these things I have been avoiding thinking about you can’t do that when you’re not drunk.
And when I see people they remind me of things I can’t remember that is unpleasant. I don’t think I was a hardcore alcoholic I didn’t get dt when I stopped or any sickness. But some people can drink and be fine I was not one of them.
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I know bro, for years I’ve been thinking, what was it that my family has done to deserve this? I have no answer, my family were great people…I remember several times my parents helping other families monetary because they were in a bind or have them live with us till get back on their feet…
My brother’s and I do/did the same thing…I just chalk it up and say that’s part of life, we all have good and bad things that happen in our lives and we just have to move on…
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Hatred and anger are easy, forgiveness is not.
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depression is like be a zombie with life
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Can you tell me about it. I’m in great pain. With that comes depression. I have seen the stuff for years. Never tried it. I take one pill. I have to. It puts me down. Does thc help yes. When I find the strains I like. But still. Anyway peace
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In certain scenes it’s very easy to find. Rave/Club/Hippie types.
They are saying a single dose of K can be a cure for weeks. Only lasts like 45 minutes, I don’t find it to be terribly pleasant or fun, but a lot of people like it. It’s not very expensive. $80-$100/gram and that’s probably 20-25 individual doses
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Sorry I just noticed these comments about K. It’s actually one of the few things I’ve never tried but I know a few people who did therapy with it. It was pretty effective for the people and lasted for a few months (3-6 maybe)before they felt they needed to do something again. They were given K thru IV and did psychotherapy while under the influence. Shits really pricey, if I really had the desire I’d just find some good K and have a trusted sitter to prompt me to talk about my issues. Seems a much cheaper version. Another person who did the therapy in Cali claimed they pretty much gave it to him and left him alone in a room but he was less than honest at times so who knows.
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As far as a party drug goes I think it kind of sucks to be honest, even unpleasant, but the results for depression are very interesting. Especially with people with major depressive disorder, like folks who can’t even get out of bed. Some folks LOVE it though, I had a friend who was actually addicted to it.
It’s one of the most common cheapest drugs there is, if you’ve ever been under for surgery you’ve almost certainly been given it in IV form. In many countries you don’t even need a prescription.
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Such a good example…pretty much how I’ve felt for a long ass time. Intermittent spurts of content/ moments of happiness, but lately just that if im lucky. Plays hell on life, end up just kinda there but your soul might as well be gone. Ever find yourself staring at the wall for hours and just thinking about your constant fuck ups, wasted opportunities and the ones who need you most that you essentially are/have failed? For a while when I would go across roads/intersections I started closing my eyes as I would come rolling up/through it. Thankfully I stopped the last one about a year ago, but the depression and shit is a daily battle. I’ve lost more plants in the last 4/5 months than I want to think about than I want to even think about. There’s alot more but it was hard enough even saying that. Fuck I used to damn near live on OG, now if im lucky im on once maybe weekly if that, depression is a fucky thing, I’d like to say meds aren’t working, but I know when things are going ok they may not be perfect but they do help. Sorry for the rant and shit, life’s just been 8 ways to crazy lately and today kinda was icing on cake.
Stuck home after being only person in house to test positive for covid today, think its about time for a mental reset soon, never had ketamine but mushrooms usually do pretty good at resetting.
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Wasup @Deadinside88 so my dude , Keep ya head Up, stay positive, and don’t give in to the bad feelings. Its a important thing than I can say to you.
Medicines help, of course, even more modern ones, they can be more expensive but they are effective. Mushrooms help a lot, micro doses, I used the last time new year, but it was a co use. recreational/medicinal double meaning.
The main thing is that we don’t have to be victims of a picicologist. or nothing of the sort. I think what we really need is a true friend to get our feelings out about covid. best wishes for you friend.
soon you will be fine. Rest and be isolated.
And stay logged in on og
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My mom, whom I miss like the sun misses the moon, has been gone not quite a year and we would have celebrated her birthday on Feb 11th. 
As the day grows closer, I find I’m having a harder time sleeping. I’m thinking about my loss and my grief more and more.
It seems like everywhere I look lately she (the universe) is giving me signs that her spirit is with me, that’s not enough though! 
I get so angry because, her and I won’t get to do the things I had planned for us to do together. 
It doesn’t matter though and my anger is for naught because it doesn’t change the fact that she is gone.
I still miss her intensely and I still wish she was here! 
Fuck cancer! 
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I hear ya on the moments of joy and happiness. The soon fade, especially when my diet is unhealthy, and it’s winter. You should play fortnite sometime 
-Hip Hop
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Lmao I used to play it and other games quite a bit, these days when I try to play games I find myself either unable to decide what to play or just not able to get into it.
If ya ever play I sent ya a request
All one can do is keep pushing forward and not give in. Some days its harder than others, alot of it is home life and issues with family and shit like that. Been on verge of divorce/threatened with it so many times over last few years that I’ve just kinda accepted that its gonna happen. I have some amazing friends and people in my life, its just hard for me to actually open up as so many times in past doing so got me fucked over alot and usually the ones I trusted ended up being the last people I should have. Idk dude, just gets hard to keep getting back up and trying. As for the covid part, it doesn’t bother/worry me, we caught it back in october, and I’d rather deal with the virus than the shit from some of the people in my life. I try to get on OG when I can/have the ambition, have a few friends that I’ve told that if their ever worried and haven’t heard from me to check here as I don’t really use social media much but usually was pretty frequent here(even if it’s just commenting or asking questions on things).
Regardless I remind myself constantly that things could always be worse.
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Might be hopping on at some point today, just updated over weekend but haven’t actually gotten on yet, I think last time I actually played was like October or Nov for a round or 2.
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