It’s such an insidious drug. I’ve overindulged on other substances, but nothing makes bad decisions like booze. Nothing scarier than someone telling you all the things you did while blacked out. Like…behaving normally. Driving 40 minutes home on the interstate. I could have killed someone…and this happened multiple times. I’ve fallen down flights of stairs, passed out and woke up in strange places (including jail). I used to start sweating around 9PM because that’s when my hangover started subsiding. I used to drink a pint of whiskey before I even started drinking at a bar or party. Things were rough for several years, big reason was being on probation and unable to smoke weed. But booze is cool, drink up.
But maaaan if you feel bad about life it’s an easy and cheap bandaid that no one gets mad at you for applying. I was around drunks so much that I just thought it was a facet of life. Which it is. I thought it was normal for kids to hang around bars and for parents to have mixed drinks in the console while driving.
Like I said…true love/hate. The sound of ice cubes clinking in a tumbler of bourbon…hnnnng. A dozen ice cold beers on a hot summer night…If you’ve got the booze bug it makes sense. It really makes the brain be quiet. Now I get to think about every embarrassing moment of a decade plus on the sauce (I can remember) before I go to sleep.
I still drink just far far less. It’s much less attractive when you’re happy or close to it. A pint of booze or a six pack will have me feeling like death the entirety of the next day.