New Cannabis Technology WiHi

For Immediate Release: 04/01/2019
Contact: Joe King, CEO of Blue Ocean Labs
joe.king@blueoceanlabs.com
San Francisco, California-

Blue Ocean Labs, a subsidiary of Confident Cannabis, introduces Wi-Hi™©® (Patent US42021010552.5), a breakthrough discovery in cannabis technology using its proprietary S2S (Streaming-2-Stoned) delivery system. Blue Ocean Labs was founded to discover new cannabinoid delivery methodologies that could lead to the next hot industry trend. Now that nano delivery methods are universally standardized and widely available, the future is clear. The future is cannabis Wi-Fi. The future is Wi-Hi™©®.

“The cannabis industry is hands down the most science-forward industry the universe has ever seen,” says Blue Ocean Labs CEO and Founder Joe King. “We gave ourselves a large hairy goal and I nailed it. We, or rather I, found the next cutting-edge cannabinoid delivery method with S2S, and boy does it work. There’s nothing like feeling funky as you stream your Sinatra with Wi-Hi™©®.”

Wi-Hi™©® “streams” your favorite cannabinoids, such as THC, CBD, and CBG. Using “over the air” technology, Streaming-2-Stoned encodes the desired cannabinoid compounds into radio waves emitted from any Wi-Hi™©® smart wi-fi router. Upon coming in contact with the reveler’s skin, the encoded wi-fi waves reprogram the user’s DNA to augment their endogenous endocannabinoid system, mimicking the same process used by cannabis plants to create these unique compounds.

“We are on a mission to bliss out the world. We single-handedly will solve world pain, hunger, and violence,” declared Steve Albarran, CEO of Confident Cannabis. “As we thought about the macro trends changing the world today – ubiquitous internet connectivity, amazing mobile phone gaming, and rapid cannabis legalization – we knew S2S was the future, and Wi-Hi™©® 1.0 is the first glimpse of that future. You’re welcome.”

Confident Cannabis and Blue Ocean began the partnership on May 31, 2019 to find a solution to this important issue. The team turned to research compiled around micelle-encapsulated quantum dot, photon to matter conversion research, and other factually true science for inspiration.

A junior staff member literally had a “Eureka!” moment while taking a break from his COA configuration to play PUBG, an online multiplayer video game. “While sitting around waiting for the game lobby to load new players, I thought to myself, it sure would be great if my headphones could get me high right now,” said Roland Blunt, Jr. Lab Tech at Blue Ocean Labs. “I don’t want to stop playing in between rounds just to set up my dab rig.” With that simple thought – poof! – Wi-Hi™©® was born.

The legendary Wi-Hi™©® system is now available at every cannabis retailer, electronics store and e-commerce website in the world. Confident Cannabis is so confident in its cannabis delivery system, that it backs its Wi-Hi™©® system with its famous infinity forever guarantee.

“To deliver any compound through radio waves would be such a remarkable breakthrough, that to only talk about Wi-Hi™©® in the context of cannabis is myopic” remarked Dr. Ikan Teven, Dean of Science at Stanforth University. “I’m dubious a doobie-induced discovery of this magnitude actually happened during a gaming sesh … but then again, that’s how we got CRISPR, nuclear fission and penicillin.”

Although the discovery is recent, the product development is complete and the brand is ubiquitous. Nevertheless, Confident Cannabis will not stop here. The next stage of Wi-Hi™©® growth will be to introduce S2SaaS – Streaming-2-Stoned-as-a-Service – the world’s first pay-as-you-go streaming cannabinoid service. Members will be able to seamlessly integrate their cannabis binging with their video binging, all wrapped into a convenient bundle offered by their local internet service provider.

“We are excited to bring this technology to market and get everyone giga-baked,” Joe King added.

To learn more about Wi-Hi™©® and how to buy one, please email: GetMeWiHiWithLightspeedWeed@confidentcannabis.com.

About Blue Ocean Labs: Blue Ocean Labs believes in cutting edge cannabis technology. Our mission is to bring the best of cannabis to the public. Founded by Confident Cannabis and Joe King in 2015 the company has quietly been creating and experimenting with cannabis at a secret lab on Angel Island in the bowels of Alcatraz.

About Confident Cannabis: Confident Cannabis was founded to foster a sustainable and vibrant ecosystem in which every ethical cannabis business thrives. Confident Cannabis empowers all verticals in the supply chain—and ultimately consumers—to know what is made, who makes it, and what it’s made of, nationwide, in real-time. It’s the only place where cannabis producers, processors, wholesalers and retailers showcase and discover products from verified businesses with test results directly from licensed labs.
For more information, please visit: https://www.confidentcannabis.com

I received this email from my lab this morning. In your dreams, maybe.

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That’s amazing. Holy radio-wave Batman!

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Lol. Had me going for a bit.

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Lol greatest April fool’s post today

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Thank you, thank you.

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PSam Had them all fooled again

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