As some of you may be aware … I haven’t found my self on OG here lately and with good reason the last couple of months starting in the first week in November Iv had some ongoing family problems Iv been with my wife for just over seventeen years of marriage and we have a wonderful son together. Times have been rough over the last couple of years and Megan has asked for a separation. I’m very upset over this as to why we couldn’t have found a way to fix our problems. I’m in counseling currently to help sort things out but it’s not easy , Iv been off meds for high BP for awhile and recently am getting that under control now .
If that’s not enough there’s more ! We are prepping our house to put it on the market cause she feels she needs physical distance from me . So with a sad heart I’m just letting everyone know that I’ll won’t be growing here at my current place … not sure at this point if I’ll even be planting seeds in the next months cause I’m unsure of where I’m even going to be in two months time .
I don’t consider myself as to have many friends close by for support to where I can lean on from time to time , so if you could find it in your hearts to drop some encouraging words it would be appreciated
I will still continue to monitor OG and help out where I can with any problems that peeps may have trouble with . The support Iv seen here at OG has been incredible and I think of all of you as a second family ! Hopefully 2020 will be good and hopefully I can reunite with my family on down the road.
I really wish I knew the right words to say, something that could help to alleviate some of the stress and pain you are going through… It’s a tough situation to deal with, but I am sure you know that people here on OG will offer as much support as possible…
Sorry to hear this brother. Me and Mrs cola came very close to separating too. So much so I was looking for a canal boat to live on. We seem to be making progress. She’s got a new job away from home for the most part of the day. So we actually have time to be separate and actually appreciate the time we get together now. Sometimes life is just generally shit mate and there’s nothing much we can do but roll with it. Your son needs you to keep your shit together whatever happens too. That’s probably what kept my fight up this end. You’ve got many friends in us fellow cunts on OG anyway. And all you gotta do is holla if you need anything.
I sincerely hope 2020 sees you rekindle your relationship and spend many more years together happily.
Al (cola)
I am just reading this as I am about to go to bed but felt compelled to send some words your way…
Wow man I am so sorry for your new year to be starting off on this foot. I have no kids and have never been married but I can only have compassion for how much pain this must be inside your heart and mind. Considering how hurt I have been in the past over much shorter relationships suddenly taking a turn in from what seems like one good moment to pretty much a complete end, I cannot imagine
I hope you and your kid will be able to have a wonderful loving lasting bond that you can cherish for your lifetime and may the sadness be easy on your soul. I have definite bouts of depression that seemingly caused by relationship scars but it always fades, with time, and I am able to find happiness and joy in the good memories shared, the possibilities of the future and the growth it has caused me.
Im not great with words but know that everything will somehow someway work out and there is always someone here on OG to offer support, I am sure of that.
Sorry to hear of your misfortune. Life is unpredictable, as are the people we share our lives with.
I realize that you probably do not want to hear some platitudinous cliches regarding the human condition. But cliches become so for a reason. That is, that they ring true.
The more you are forced to endure emotional strife and suffering, the deeper the rapturous joy awaiting you after this storm passes.
A day at a time.
Hopefully, you can work this out without the need to involve lawyers, and their tendency to make things even worse.
Hang in there Mr. Tuttle!
Be strong, you are not alone.
I’ve been in your situation before and it sucks but, I can honestly say and I know it’s cliche but, it does get better with time. I’m not sure how old your son is but I’m sure this affects him also so just try to be there for each other and we’ll be here for you when you need us.
These situations really suck. My wife and I had a separation just a little while back ourselves after 5 years of marriage (her idea as well). I know how devastating it can be, but try to keep your head up. Keep working on yourself and your son, and try to just listen to her issues and work on them together. It will all work out the way it’s meant to. Best of luck to you brother!
Damn Tt, I’m fairly new to the Og community but I’ve literally spent hours of time reading many posts on here and I can tell that you are highly intelligent and respected here. I hope that whatever the outcome you keep your head up and in the game, you can only look forward to better days as this is one of life’s big tests. The end result is strength and conditioning to be better at what comes your way. Stay strong and may God be with you and your family. Believe it or not, many prayers coming your way !
This community outpouring is incredible, this is not seen on most forums I’ve been on! These people care about you, and as a human being, so do I.
I’ve been through a lot myself and learned some tricks along the way. I’ve been with my wife for 22 years, married for 20 this last October and was real close to separating a few times over the years.
Communication is key in these relationships, without communication all will be lost… keep talking to each other, it’s important.
I’m extending an ear, if you need it. Sometimes it’s easier to talk about your problems with someone you don’t know. If you feel the need to talk, I have good ears and will listen.
Sorry to hear you are in this situation. My ex and I split after almost 15 years together. After a year of therapy and a three month trial separation, our counselor suggested we divorce. We stayed together another year before finally deciding to get divorced. It took another year to finalize it.
That was about five years ago. I’m happy to say. We have been able to co-parent our daughter and are somewhat friendly with each other.
I never wanted to see my father with a new woman. Him my mother devorced when I was 5. For 28 years hes been single. He gave up his hopes and dreams and devoted his remained life to his children. I feel in a way he gave up on himself to accomplish being the person he had to be now. Hes just now paid my mother the rest of the back child support. I feel that if you need child support you dont deserve custody. After I graduated high school I convinced my father to buy a house with me and we did, nearly paid off. Now he’s fully retired and lives in a house thats paid for. I watched my father live like shit for 15 years so he could pay my mother 50% of what he made. Its the least I can do for him after what he gave for me. I felt selfish for not liking any new woman he ever introduced to me. Life is not kind. But in a way things tend to balance out in the end.
You do you and take care of yourself, you’ll get it all worked out in time as shit happens but all for a reason usually just takes time to understand it so one foot in front of the other is all one can do…
For what it is worth, my mrs. said the same thing, we didn’t sell the house, got divorced, and 3 years later remarried. It can work. It all depends if both parties want it to work.
Oh man that’s rough. I have been through a divorce and as many have already said, things really do work themselves out and likely for the better. You may have a difficult time seeing it now, but life will be good again. Try to promise yourself that you won’t spend any more emotional energy than you have to.
