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Indoor Growing Growroom Diaries
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Yeah, I was sober for six years (like fifteen years ago haha), so I’ve done it. And there’s been times in the last few years where I would quit for like a month or six weeks. When I got sober in my 20’s, though, it wasn’t literally painful, my body didn’t “vibrate” and I didn’t feel like I had battery acid in my veins, even though I was doing all kinds of other drugs besides just drinking. I just quit. And it was easy. No withdrawals, no nothing.

This time it’s different. And a lot harder. I guess because I’m older? I don’t really know. But it’s time, I think. I’m gonna die really soon if I keep it up like this.

I’m just having a really hard time reconciling getting sober with continuing to grow and smoke weed. I’m not gonna stop growing. It’s one of the few things in my life that brings me pure joy. And I love talking about it with you guys, too, so…

Yeah, I dunno. But the process has started. And it sucks haha…

Thank you.

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Good luck with the recovery. I hadn’t had a break in 20yrs and knew it was time or I wouldn’t be here either. Tomorrow is 23 months without and I could be more proud of myself. I didn’t go through withdraws but sure got edgy… I would drink at least 12pack of ipa everyday, or half handle of Appleton rum. If you need anything reach out, if there is anything I can help with I gladly will!

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Congrats, dude! Are you going to meetings or…? I keep thinking maybe I’ll go to meetings once I actually stop. I went for a year straight, sometimes twice a day, the last time I “quit for good” haha, but I’m on the fence right now about going back. Like I said, I’m having a really hard time with the whole “I’m gonna get sober but keep growing and smoking weed” thing.

That’s actually my goal for this first day of weening haha. “If you can only drink a 12-pack today, you’ll be on your way!” haha. I put 12 in the kitchen fridge and told my girl,”This is what I can drink today. I can’t drink more than this.” It helps if you verbalize your goals haha.

Fuuuuuuck me….

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940

Thanks, it was pretty difficult for the first few months. Everyone I know, including my wife drinks(still). I have not attended meetings, I had to do enough NA meetings for court requirements years ago. I actually get out and go for a jog or a run or a bike. Anything to get my mind off of it. I haven’t and won’t ever give up cannabis! That’s probably been what has saved me from drinking, I did find I smoked a bit more for the first bit but that was to keep busy, anything but drinking. All I knew was drinking, I loved camping, boating, vacation, anything to wake up and have an excuse to pop one open at 6am. I found it was all about keeping my mind busy and staying away from the bar!

What is your thinking about the not drinking but still growing and smoking if I may ask?

So yesterday I went to the keys and met my parents down there for a 4 mile walk. My mom says to me, I’m so proud of you for not drinking like you used to, and if you ever had a drink or 2 I wouldn’t think differently. Well she must not know an “addict/alcoholic”! yeah right 1, there is never one, but you have to know that and keep it in the forefront of your mind ALWAYS!

I get cravings once in a while still but they are short lived. ADHD won’t let my mind stick to anything too long.

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Yeah, this is another thing that I’m having an issue with. My girl actually doesn’t drink at all. I mean, maybe she’ll have one glass of wine or one margarita when we have people over, but otherwise she doesn’t drink. It’s one of the main reasons why I settled down with her. Do you know how difficult it is to be dating in your mid-30’s and NOT find somebody with serious substance abuse issues??? Haha. It’s why they’re still single! They’re fucked up! haha. And don’t get me wrong, I love those super-high chicks, but still… I’m not gonna move in with one of them haha.

But all of my friends kind of view our house as, like, “the place where we go when we wanna get lit.” I’ve been talking about that with my girl, actually, like,”But what if nobody comes over anymore once I quit drinking?” At the same time, I made a lot of friends when I was going to AA. One of my best and closest friends has been sober for 25 years, so… I dunno. I’m sure it’ll be fine.

Just so you know, if you ever get arrested and have to go to meetings again, you don’t actually have to go to the meetings. I used to have, like, my bartenders and dealers sign my card when I was on probation, never actually went to a meeting. It’s called “Narcotics ANONYMOUS” for a reason. They can’t prove who was there and who wasn’t. It’s anonymous! Haha.

Because being baked isn’t exactly being sober. And also, when the weather’s nice and I smoke a joint, my first reaction is always,”I wanna sit by the pool and enjoy a drink. And put on some music. And chill the fuck out.” But because I’m an alcoholic, “one beer” isn’t something that’s ever gonna happen.

Yeah, I work out like a motherfucker when I’m not drinking. And when I’m single, I just have tons of anonymous sex with chicks I meet online, too. And I DO NOT feel guilty about it haha. Never understood those Sex Addicts Anonymous people…

Aw, man, I love the Keys. That’s the only place in Florida I would willingly go haha.

Why did I think you lived in NorCal? I thought you lived up there?

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thank gosh my wife doesnt drink like that either, she will just have a glass of wine or 2 with dinner.
i totally understand what you mean about hanging with the “friends”, not to knock anyone or anything but are those really your “friends”? friends care about ones well being!!! you will find the ones who still enjoy hanging out and doing things with you, and you may find the others who were "using " you(speaking for myself).
being high sure isnt the same as being sober but its really different than alcohol. ive found my memory is amazing now, i have more patience than i ever did before, still dont like most people though(hard to living in miami)!!! yeah lived in miami my whole life, parents were born here as well.
please man if you want to talk to anyone i can give you my number even! get with your buddy with 25yrs sobriety and ask him some pointers, im a “beginner”! i wish you so much luck on your journey through this!

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No, dude, these aren’t just some assholes who come over and “use me for my drugs” or whatever haha. They’re my friends. I’ve known them for 20 or 30+ years, when I was sober and when I wasn’t.

All that talk about,”Maybe they won’t come over once I quit drinking…” is really me just saying,”I dunno if I wanna go through the whole ‘quitting drinking process…’” haha.

Good ol’ Miami… Haven’t been there in forever, but I always liked it. And I love the Keys. It’s just unfortunate that they’re in Florida… haha.

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Haha OK true friend then yes!
The keys are the only thing keeping me in miami, have a place in tavernier and a buddy that has 2 places one on big pine and one being built on ramrod. If your ever down there hit me up for sure, but stay away because it must be the drinking capital of the US.

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You should feel very proud of this accomplishment!

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lol i thought you were in your 50’s/60’s or you guys started dating way back?

to me alcohol and weed dont mix well. although i do drink every now and then, ive been fortunate enough not to be addicted to it, and i dont really know how i avoided it because i was right on the path to in my youth, and i do tend to become addicted to shit.

i have been addicted to nicotine/cigarettes and it was a pain leaving it, and i am addicted to sugar (which sounds like a joke, but not when youre prediabetic). addictions are a tough topic, rehab centers dont really work that much (theres a really nice john oliver episode about rehab centers and another an AA).

how did you do it?

i know ppl who have gone to dbt therapy successfully for alcoholism… although, its not really designed for that.

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Man i’m sorry you guys gotta through all this. Quitting habits much less addictions is a p.i.t.a. I wish you best of luck! You can definitely do this! :muscle:

Idk about you guys but weed is the one thing that keeps me from drinking…

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I can smoke while drinking but eventually the spins come on and neither are much fun after that. I just don’t like the way it feels combining the two. But I wanna be high all the time :joy:.in seriousness, because it relieves my pain. I had to do two years of drug probation and drop randomly every ~25 days. I couldn’t smoke at all. I ended up drinking sooo much trying to cover the pain and whatnot… I put on like 50lbs just from beer and liquor. Soon as I got off that probation I went back to smoking again. Over time, the more herb I smoked = the less I drank. The more I didn’t even wanna drink, if I was smoking. I don’t drink at all these days unless its social event. Didn’t plan it that way, it just kinda happened.

Hopefully something helps ya out :confused: But definitely gotta break the cycle bro, you gotta stick around. We got a ton more herb to grow and talk about :wink:

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My folks live on BPK

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Could always do some open-pollinations / F2s or something where you end up with mostly seeds instead of usable flowers. Allows you to continue growing yet at the same time take a break from consuming. Donating flowers to a legit med patient is an option too…

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950

Best of luck dude, that shit can be tough to put down. My pops still drinks Budweiser to this day and he’s about 73 now. I fuckin’ love beer too (especially the good ones), and some nice cocktails on occasion, but I find it hard to turn off once I get going. I start turning into an asshole if I drink a lot, so I’m abstaining completely for a while.

As others have mentioned, just smoke a lot of weed for a while. Not really saying you should substitute one addiction for another, but if you’ve quit other drugs, you know quitting weed ain’t hard either. And I know you can only smoke so much weed, too.

Shit, when I struggled with addiction for a couple of years, the only thing that snapped me out of it was a really unexpectedly strong LSD trip. Have you considered macro dosing or micro dosing psilocybin to help you ween? Or work through some of your issues with alcohol? Happy to help with supplies if you need them. I know some people take psychedelics and just want to party, but you really would have to not go into ‘party mode’ and more of ‘lock yourself in a dark room and meditate’ kind of mode. It helps to mentally prepare yourself for that kind of experience before you do it.

Hell, didn’t the guy that started AA credit LSD for helping him quit alcohol?

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My wife’s best friends owned the fishing lodge and sea center up until 2 yrs or so ago. You ever get down there.

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Yea I go down every year for xmas. Been going down there for around 20 years or so now

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Pulling for you @minitiger wish I could be of more help with the whole thing, but I’m in your corner if nothing else. :heart::v:t2:

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Wtf, I’m down with a toothache for a few days and I come back to this. Get your shit together will ya @minitiger!!

No but seriously man, sending good vibes your way, you can do it! Your will is stronger than any one thing dude.

The sooner the better, everyday it will get harder. Why not just quit right now? I say you quit as soon as you read this post, fuck it, why wait a few days, a few weeks, what will you gain.

I’m with @iamyou_youareme , a heavy shroom dose or 2 could do wonders.

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Haha, no, not quite yet. I’ll be 50 in two years.

Hopefully… haha.

Ummm… dating? Not really. My girl was just part of the constantly evolving rotating cast of 15 or 20 random women that was always changing, booty calls, whatever you wanna call it. And then I just decided to settle down. But yeah, we’ve been together for a long time now. Definitely longer than I ever thought I’d be with anybody haha.

I really love being single. But this is okay, too… haha.

I just quit. It wasn’t hard at all, but that was twenty years ago. It seems like it’s much more difficult now, simply because of the physical reaction that didn’t happen when I was younger. Plus, I was, like, on again-off again homeless and I did NOT want to be homeless in LA; my sister lived here at the time and said I could stay with her, but only if I quit partying. That seemed like a better option than being homeless.

Yeah, me, too. I haven’t been blazing enough lately at all.

I used to give a bunch of every harvest to my next-door neighbor, super-old lady, and she always appreciated it. But then she got put in a home because she had dementia and her house got bought by some hipster couple. I give them weed, too, but I don’t think they blaze it too often haha.

Yeah, I’m kind of like,”Well Harry Dean Stanton was drinking every day ‘til he was 90!” haha. “And smoking cigarettes, too! If he could do it, so can I!” haha.

Yeah. I’ve got a shitload of shrooms in the freezer, bought them a while back because I thought it might help. Tried it. It did not help haha. All they do is make me wanna eat more until I’m tripping my balls off, but when I’m tripping my balls off, I wanna pound tons of alcohol and smoke tons of weed, too.

There’s just no “middle of the road” kinda thing over here, man. It’s always all or nothing. I dunno why, exactly, other than I think it’s really fun to get super-fucked up. I really LOVE getting lit. But it’s alright. I’m gonna chill soon.

Uh… I don’t know if I’ve ever heard that, but AA in general works. Or it did for me, anyway. I quit going to meetings a year after getting sober, but stayed sober for another five years, so… Yeah, that shit works. I dunno how it does haha, but it does.

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I’m trying, dude. The last time I quit cold-turkey, I had a fucking seizure. And leading up to the seizure, it was just bizarre. I couldn’t sleep at all, I kept saying to my girl,”Man, this is so fucked up, I’ve gotten three hours of sleep in the last three days, I haven’t slept for 40 hours straight…” And then I took a shower and got in bed and five minutes later had a seizure.

I don’t remember any of it, because, you know, I was having a fucking seizure haha, but she had to call an ambulance and I had to go to the hospital and shit. It was fucked up.

So now I have to do this whole “weening process” thing, but it doesn’t always work out. Or rather, it takes a lot longer than just saying,”Okay, fuck this, I’m going cold-turkey.” But at least I don’t have a seizure haha…

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