Guess I am just not up on the trends. I go with these.
3 Likes
Booo the tshirt non-believers. Only the Hoodie folk know the true way. Shun the non-bellievers!
I have too many black t shirts.
I know this because I walk the dog on sunny afternoons and black t shirts truly suck in his heat.
Cool shirt though Doug.
1 Like
What do you call a stoner with two spliffs? Double-jointed
5 Likes
Bahahahahahaha. Good one
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woke up to a flooded basement. just a fun time. fk. fk. fk. now have to have a plumber over and see my set up… hate having people know whats up i dont trust many ppl
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Mines coming tomorrow but I leave for the airport at 7 am 
Just beyond the Gates of Hell, an alcoholic, a womanizer, and a stoner find themselves standing in front of three identical doors.
There to greet them is none other than Satan, who tells them a secret method to getting into Heaven: Each man must spend 1,000 years in a room with their greatest vice. If he does so, he will be allowed to enter Heaven. The catch? At the end of the 1,000 year period, if the man asks to be let out of the room, he instead will be trapped inside forever.
The first man, being a lifelong alcoholic, is presented with a room identical to his favorite drinking spot. Some of his old drinking buddies are present, along with infinitely replenishing spirits of all kinds! The first man is ecstatic and, thinking it will be an easy feat, runs inside and slams the door behind him.
The second man, known for being quite the pervert, immediately feels his blood start pumping as the second door is opened. Inside are women of every shape, size, color, you name it. Every woman this man has ever fantasized about is here, ready to obey his every command. Without a word the second man rushes inside, closing the door behind him.
Now the third man, having been a cannabis connoisseur for most of his life, stands in awe of the marvel before him. Inside his room is a forest containing every strand of marijuana conceivable; the shrubs are the most beautiful green hues, ebitting the stickiest of smells; the ground is littered with the highest quality nuggs from Nepal, the dirt is hash rocks and kief, and the trees are actually twenty foot tall plants. The stoner can’t wait to get eternally stoned and happily jaunts inside his room.
1,000 years pass…
Satan, being a man of his word, decides to check on each of the men. He opens the door to the first man’s room, only to find the most disgusting mess he had ever seen: blood, booze, and bodily fluids create a disgusting miasma throughout the room. Broken glass litters the floor, and the man’s once-friends lie dead in various states of decay. After searching for a while, Satan happens upon the man, shrivelled up and nestled in a pile of bottles, crying and bleeding profusely. The man’s wracking sobs stop as his trembling lips work to form a sentence: “P-please… Get m-me out of here…”
Satan, a man of his word, reminds the man of the condition upon which he was imprisoned, and having broken his end of the bargain, the man is trapped inside eternally.
“The second man must have done better than that one”, Satan thinks to himself while opening the second door. Moments later, hundreds upon thousands of people come flooding out, men, women, children of all creeds, along with the scents of human waste and burnt flesh. Eventually Satan sees the man he locked in here riding the wave of people. “Get me out of here!” The man screams, and Satan seals the door forever.
The third door is all that remains now; as Satan opens it, he sees the stoner meditating in the center of the forest, surrounded by a pool of tears. The forest had been untouched for the full thousand years. Satan is understandably quite confused! The stoner opens his eyes in disbelief and runs over to Satan, and shaking him by the collar he says: “Do you have a lighter, man?!”
6 Likes
I grabbed the spirit train f2 and cherry Brandy f3.
Edit: the first time I checked I couldn’t get through, but I tried the next day and was able to grab those.
1 Like
Input needed well help more of
Connie who? Did another one die?
Blessings…
Out on the road for forty days.
Last night in Little Rock put me in a haze.
Sweet sweet Connie was doing her act.
She had the whole show and thats a natural fact.
Ring a bell?
2 Likes
We’re an American Band!
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I love the King Palm wraps so F kin good.
Easy to pack & burn slow and no Nicotine.
1 Like
A stoner goes into a pawn shop
He looks around for a little while and sees a TV he really likes, so he goes up to the pawn shop owner and says “excuse me sir I’d like to buy that TV over there” the pawn shop owner says “I don’t sell to stoners get out!”
The stoner leaves and a week later returns to the pawn shop and says to the owner, “sir I really want this TV will you please sell it to me?” once again the owner says “I don’t sell to stoners get out!”
Once again the stoner leaves and a week later goes back to try again, once again he goes up to the owner and says “sir I really want this TV please sell it to me, and again the owner says,” how many times do I have to tell you I DON’T SELL TO STONERS! "
now irritated and offended the stoner says" How do you even know that I am a stoner? " the pawn shop owner says
Because that’s a Microwave
12 Likes
Grand Funk. What a band in their early years. Sweet Sweet Connie was a rock groupie. I actuall met her a couple times. We kinda hung out at the same bar when i lived in Little Rock. Actually a very nice intelligent woman.
4 Likes
No ish eh? Wow that would have been incredible. What a band is right, legendary . my bad, thought I were referring to grand funk at the same bar, I have heard of Connie in an interview once I remember
1 Like
Stoner goes into a pet store looking for a good singing bird. Heard this one?
So the pet store owner goes over to his birds and says, “This bird is a real singer. Ive heard him sing the star spangled banner.” ( national anthem of US for my Northern friends)
So off the stoner goes with the bird. 2 days later he brings the bird back an demands his money back. The pet store owner says whats the matter? Don’t the bird sing?” Stoner says “Duuudde! The bird sings frickin Zeppelin tunes. But you knew good and well, when you sold me this bird, that one leg was shorter than the other”
Pet store guy says “I aint refunding SHIT! When you came in here you wanted a singer. If you wanted a dancer you shoulda said so. “
3 Likes
The Pope, the President, the Smartest Man on Earth, and a Stoner are on a plane.
The pilot comes over the intercom.
“Everyone, we’ve had some major hardware malfunctions. We’re going to have to jump out. There are only 4 parachutes, and there are five of us. I’m the pilot, so I should live.”
Before anyone can protest, the pilot grabs a parachute and jumps out.
The president speaks up.
“I am the ruler of the free world, and I need to live through this.”
He grabs a parachute and jumps.
The smartest man on earth quickly grabs one as well.
“I’m the world’s greatest genius, so I deserve a parachute.”
He jumps out, leaving the Pope and the stoner to decide who gets to live.
“You are young and have a good life ahead of you,” says the Pope. “I have lived a long and fruitful life, and my time to meet god has finally come. You should take the last parachute.”
The stoner laughs.
“Relax, man. That smart dude grabbed my backpack.”
6 Likes