The trick is to buy it for her even though it’s really for you. I’ve been married awhile and know all the tricks.
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I’ll give them a bulk discount. Even though I don’t exist.
After 35 yrs I know her lol
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Are you calling from Nigeria Dang You
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I am descended from royalty but you should still buy my calendar.
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I thought it would be required to cover his manhood
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My eyes are up here man.
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I just got yelled at for posting to much
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Well since you’re already getting yelled at you might as well buy a calendar.
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Just think he can drum up this amount of interest with that one pic
imagine what the other 11 must be . Get your orde rin today people
This offer will expire shortly, hurry
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My memory is bereft of any evidence of such presented by @Foreigner, and the calendar will apparently continue to obfuscate as to the existence of such a thing (or things, depending on perspective).
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A little subtlety works wonders. Think, lingerie.
Just with plants.
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Just a teaser for all of you still on the fence. If this doesn’t convince you nothing will. But it, there’s plenty more where that came from:
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This threads blowing up. 
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I may never forgive you for bringing this to my attention 
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C’mon @Slick1 and you other ne’er do wells, make a point of doing something good in the world and support the website and your friendly Foreigner! A taste:
Not part of the calendar but me obscuring my
Face playing with plants!
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Don’t Jump. 
You need a shave.
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I shave every 2 weeks.
I’m at about 5 stories which is not really good jump territory.
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Looks like you will hit a lot shit
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But now that I have your attention I will also have a small portion of your wallet.
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