Another bonus is CBD is really good for joint pain.
I only go the lab tested route, but it’s how I’ve kept away from all the spice/meth getting sold as CBD. I’m looking at you Diamond CBD. CBD isolate with no terpenes shouldn’t get you high AF!!!
Cannabis is helping my hands stay functional as I’m losing control of my motor controls. When I’m high I can move my hands again, but with high doses of CBD I feel like my hands and wrists aren’t developing arthritis and my back no longer hunches over from scoliosis. Seriously I’m way too young to be getting these issues, but they’ve been here since I was 10. Well the scoliosis has been. It feels like something is forcing my back to bend against my control. Without cannabis I couldn’t stand up straight at all. My whole family told me for years to stand up straight. If I did I couldn’t breathe. Now I can pop my back and remove the tension for a bit to get some air ad try to fix my posture one day at a time hoping it will stop twisting, but I know it’s just delaying the inevitable.
Anyways it helps me to not feel the pain for a bit. Once I can distracted myself that’s the point. Even for a brief moment to let my body kill the pain. Only cannabis can do that for me safely. I’ve had muscle relaxers and they help tremendously, but I can’t see straight on them when I don’t smoke. The first time I was afraid to smoke because I didn’t want to break a piece was then. Opiates only make my pain worse.
Other than that it helps me to eat. For some reason I lose my appetite and even if I’m hungry if I try to eat my throat will close up and it feels like my esophagus dislodged somewhere. According to my mother who has it and had to tell me about it before I understood what she said as she is poor with words, I have a extremely rare genetic disorder that involves the throat. It’s extremely painful to eat during those times. Yet again cannabis to the rescue. It gives me my appetite back and allows me to eat the volume of food my body needs. I have a tapeworm level high metabolism. I’ve already been tested and it’s not any of the genetic ones like graves or hashimoto or even anything with my thyroid. My only hint is I digest too quickly. No matter having to maintain a high protein, high fat, and high iron diet is expensive. Veggies only give me so much, but spinach does help a lot. This damn thing will be the death of me if I can’t eat 8 meals a day.
Again though cannabis saved me there too. The companion plants I’ll be growing alongside them as the years go by will also be a good source of nutrients for me. I’m like my tall girl. I can’t seem to drink or eat enough. Freshly grown and harvested veggies do seem to digest much more slowly. Than anything in a store. They’ll help my plants and me in one go. I have to trim the companions down to keep them in check occasionally and with that I’ll have food that day that won’t be empty calories.
Damn I think I really hate this damn body of mine. though it could be my sense of mortality being annoying today. I miss when I weighed 20lbs more and I was 2 inches shorter.
Pity party wasn’t the way that was meant to sound.
More of a rant as I complain about unchangeable things that piss me off. Way too high to word it right. Plus it’s bed time. All I have rn are my thoughts and memories. Something I’m missing while not using cannabis. It’s like a crowd of people in my head all talking at once I can’t stop all the racing thoughts. Plus the memory issues from lithium persisted long after I stopped using it.
The only thing that helps is smoking weed to comatose levels. Each time I remain memory long lost. Another chunk of 2005-2012 comes back each time.
Double edged sword though is I’m also learning more about my disabilities as I do this. As I learn what it is I have slowly and check with a doctor I find I’m right each time. Though I blame the autism. Damn thing makes me obsessed sometimes. When I smoke I have it, but I sorta change into a different person. I’m no longer controlled by my impulses when I get high. It allows me a safe space to work out my serious psychotic disorders to learn what the possibilities are. I leave the rest to the doctors and I get years of therapy saved thanks to this plant too.
I’ve been able to gain more control over myself in just my first year of cannabis use vs the worsening symptoms with so many side effects they got confused about what to diagnose me with. I’m in year 6 now and I’ve reached the point where I feel like I can stop bottling up my anger just to let it out in a safe manner later. Too many things cause my disorders extreme discomfort.
Sure as it sounds having all of this at once sucks, but this whole book I’ve been typing really just boils down to the fact that this 1 plant has helped me deal with all of them.