Yes, that’s the excuse I use as well 
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I put shit in front of the front door so I can’t open it without remembering what I need to bring. Probably doesn’t work on perishables though.
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The polygraph examiner who is questioning me regarding a hot urine for coke notices my roach stained fingertips when removing the sensors from my fingertips. I was in Air Force at the time. I passed.
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When you’re on vacation at an east coast beach and you wonder why you haven’t been able to catch the sunset over the ocean…
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when the only thing to eat in the house is pickled herring as you stuff your face you mumble " I love pickled herring"
will someone tell me why my posts sometimes do this light highlight shit
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When you put the lighter in your mouth and try to light it with your pipe.
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When u put the mop n glo in the fridge cause u thought it was juice.
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I hope you didn’t drink it before putting it in the fridge lol.
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Lots of good and bad stories lol. Also why my avatar name is Shadey, I always walk the thin line between light and dark.
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Same on sunrise in the west
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When you get in the wrong side of the car when your the only one using it, and pretend to look in the glove box, because the person parked next to you is giving you a funny wtf look when you have to get back in the other side to drive.
I still do it even when not stoned can’t get used to being in Canada in my head lol.
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When you run over a dead skunk 
in your car, inhale deeply, and smile…/.
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Oh nah lol I’ll be high caught up in a whirlwind of cleaning…then after I’m sober I open the fridge like who the hell put the floor cleaner in the refrigerator?! Then my wife gives me that “look”…like u did jackass, u smoke too much! 
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when going to do something and forgetting what it was you where about to do becomes a daily thing
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When you don’t have a light or papers… but you still figure it out anyway…
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Running around the house frantically looking for your car keys with them in your hands
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Along the same lines: driving down the road and having a moment of panic when you notice that the pocket where your keys should be is empty… because they’re in the ignition.
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When you drive a truck out onto a frozen lake and it sinks while trying to pull out the first truck you drove out on the frozen lake.
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… you wake and bake on a Saturday morning then wake up again at 2 in the afternoon disgusted that you wasted your Saturday sleeping but are too tired to get up so you take another bongload and go back to sleep 
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… you’re able to feel the cooler flapping of a bee’s wings next to your arm!!
Nice thread @Oldjoints !!! 
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