Holidays can be tough in a good year. This year has been a tough one. It is not over. In spite of all rough days, I muster and trudge on. Many who I love and care for are struggling much worse than I am. I’m not sure if it wasn’t for the little ones, I’d have unboxed the decorations. I did and am glad.
I’m doing OK, I made it thru dinner without leaking on my turkey and mashed potatoes. I do not pretend I am not sad. That is part of the deal too. Joy and sadness. My friend Britton’s daughter had a baby today. Someone I care about will not last many more. And so it goes.
During this last year, I had times I struggled to even breath, my grief was so huge. Then I remembered it was worse for others. I have had many great times with my family and friends. But my moments of sheer joy were elusive this year. They will return, bringing a little more joy in my life. The photo was yesterday. I was happy. I was weeping not long after. So it goes.
A lot of this kind of spewing usually comes out of me around New Year’s. Couldn’t wait.
All of you matter very much to me. Some of you know it, some don’t. But you all matter.
Thank you. PEACE, CP and family.
Merry Christmas to you and your family.
from the looks of that picture and the young smiling faces around you… you are a lucky man.
I am alone on christmas eve and most of tomorrow too. Family is 5 hours away by highway and the wife is working and so short staffed she couldn’t book off. We will do a turkey on boxing day and probably go for a walk somewhere.
So it’s me… the tree and the dog.
I think I will chain smoke doobies laced with secret santa bubble hash and play world of tanks all night LOL
Happy Holidays and I hope and pray 2024 is a better year for all of us.
Thanks buddy. World of Tanks I might look into!
Merry Christmas man. And thank you.
You are welcome as well! Not every day I get to wish a Merry Xmas to you, and others here at OG I respect for many reasons. Not many of those reasons have to do with how well you grow weed. It’s how well you show up, mostly for others.
Good night CP. I’ll be around tomorrow as well.
These are the rest of my team. They live 300 miles away, but reside in my heart and soul. A few things have gotten in the way of our seeing each other as much as planned this year. They’re such good kids. I know they are well and safe. Today that’ll have to do.
Yesterday, when my other crew left, my oldest, Nora, made a point to give me the hugest hug! So hard she shook. It has not been an easy year for her either. We have each other.
Merry Christmas to you and Jan brother! So well said and written. I hope this year is much better for all of us, you truly are blessed brother, and you are a truly great friend, you are loved and appreciated more than you know. Thank you for all you do and never forget you are needed much more than you could possibly know, not gonna lie reading your post brought tears to my eyes! Much much love and respect brother!
Merry Christmas!
Merry Christmas brotha! 
Santa put a bigger bud grinder in my stocking! The missus said I can now smoke myself stupid faster than before.
A lot of Christmas mornings and days just blend. I remember getting my 1st matchbox cars. I was 6. My older daughter was born 12/23, also my wife’s birthday. She came home Xmas eve 1984. I brought my dog, a bag of weed, and a cooler with a 12 pack. I needed more brought to me. All quite true. Bigdog. Shephard/Malamute mix. Pretty funny thinking back.
Merry Christmas to you and your family @crownpoodle
Merry Christmas Poodle!
If you love hard you will morn hard and that is OK.
Hard to handle sometimes I agree.
I loved the Christmas card type picture, you look younger in the hat… 
Maybe it is the other young faces around you. 
Here is to hoping you morn less after the new year.
The new year fucks me up pretty bad too.
One must remember… the show must go on.
I am still in morning too.
But what I have learned to do recently is…
Appreciate every moment and every loved one like it will be the last time you see them.
I can see you are currently doing that.
You have a very big heart that is why it hurts so bad.
I hope ya find a way to have a good new year holiday.
I hope 2024 is a better year for all of us as @SHSC-1 has said, some prayer would not hurt.
Remember tomorrow is not promised, so make the most of your today.
Much love and sympathy to you my brother.
Holidays can be really rough.
Hang in there brother things will get better.
Peace
Shag
This is the toy I remember most.
Mattel Vertibird Toy Helicopter
start 1 min in for flight.
I still have all my matchbox and hotwheels cars from my playing in the sandbox days. They look rough but I still have them all. It’s funny, in the stores here they have these big bins full of Hotwheels and I saw a kid the other day fingering through them and I could see the interaction between him and his mom and man it took me back to memories of being thrilled by the displays of starwars action figures and matchbox/hotwheels cars. My favorite real car is the Pantera deTomaso and I have that matchbox car since i was a little kid
@shag thanks buddy. Your comments, your friendship really, mean the world to me. The thoughts behind your words.
I have lived in the same area for decades. I have so many friends as a result of that, and all my diverse (not perverse) interests. I know your wife, kids, dogs, and the fleas on your dog. There’s a lot of reward behind all those connections, and a corresponding amount of pain as well.
This year I had more pain than I thought I could bear. My friends kept me propped up, when I wasn’t busy propping them up.
This is the 1st holiday season dealing with some extra sharp loss. Pretty rough, much worse for some others I know and care about. Like you said. “The show must go on.”
I am a passionate person. With that elevated passion is elevated pain. I signed up for both.
That Yin Yang symbol you see everywhere is no joke. Balance. I do not have a reputation as particularly “balanced” and I’m OK with that.
I have no expectations of next year being particularly better. But soon I’ll have a fresh start to try.
Now I want one @shag very cool
I had one! Man that was a blast!
Never had any RC stuff. Not a thing. My buddy flys RC planes. RC jets to be specific. I really want to go watch. Some epic crashes. I’ve seen the evidence in his car all busted up.
Me to but…
They went up a little since the 70’s …LOL
US $2,999.99