I think I may be in love with Eileen.
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Eileen is one side ways bitch. 
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As I recall, Dexys Midnight Runners have a pretty catchy song about Eileen.
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Check it out! Eileen ((MBAPxDG)xDG), a FAM, and a Sticky Dancer.
What Sticky Dancer?
What do you mean, shes right the-
Oh…
Oh, that’s right! In lieu of the Sticky Dancer check out the Blackstrap S1 sent my way by @Oldtimerunderground and the Fog Dog by way of @Rhino_buddy.
Awfully puny.
It’s too early to celebrate but good things are in the works. The arbitrary thirteen week countdown starts today!
About the Sticky Dancer…
Yes, about the Sticky Dancer indeed. Here she is:
Small but mighty. That’s all there was to her, now she’s drying out waiting to be jarred. What she lacks in size she made up for in all the fun I had growing her.
That’s awfully sweet.
Want to know what’s even more sweet?
Eileen is just a bouquet of fist sized buds, waiting to be plucked. A lady’s fist of course, my hand is a little bigger.
Yes, of course.
Yes. Well then let’s move on to the FAM, which I’m now convinced really stands for Flowering Auto Monster. This girl is a beast and she won’t stop growing. I’ve had to bend and snap her a half-dozen times already, and still she comes back for more.
If the trunk girth is any indication of how these buds will fill out then I’m in for a gardening treat. Must be jealous of all the attention Eileen has been getting.
Thank you for the lovely gardening display.
Uh, you’re welcome. I must say you’ve been on your best behaviour this evening, it’s been a real pleasure.
The pleasure was all mine. See you again soon!
Goodb- and he’s already gone.
That was different…
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Excited to see that FAM finish up.
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I tried to fist a plant once but it was too sticky and it didn’t work.
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Have to clean your fist first,duh.If you read the highlighted parts in this thread in whisper.It becomes Jim Gaffigan grows.lol
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I will try harder next time.
All looks very good.
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Exactly how big is a fist…
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Hurry up already!
Are you talking to me?
Oh it’s you! Pardon me, I was just talking to Eileen. I shouldn’t be impatient though, there is literally no rush. According to my calendar we are now eight days past the arbitrary finish date I marked down for Eileen.
Here are some trichrome shots.
I really need to take more microscope shots, I’ll admit I’ve been slacking in that department. This is partially due to having melted the USB port in my phone, the whole handheld microscopy was truly a convenience. Really I have no excuse other than I don’t like dragging my laptop down to the spare bathroom.
Anyways check out the rest of the garden:
A little bit of yellowing on the FAM, likely on account of this plant quadrupling in size over the last four weeks. I’m not too concerned at this point and quite confident she’ll make it over the finish line in style.
Speaking of finish lines the Fog Dog and Blackstrap are neck and neck, it’s a close race.
It’s honestly a bit of a relief that these seedlings haven’t blown up yet. I still need to prepare pots, soil, and space for these to grow. Just waiting on Eileen to finish up.
You’re pretty quiet today, you know that?
Do you always talk to yourself this much?
Uh, no… In fact sometimes I even speak to other people. Watch this!
According to the ER just slightly larger than I can open my jaw.
What’s that supposed to mean, tough guy?
Whoa! Easy, easy.
As the voice of the spare bathroom I think I speak for everyone here when I say we have no idea who that is.
It might even be a compliment. You know now that I think of it you do bear an uncanny resemblance to my internal monologue…
Yeah, you wish.
A man can dream. Nice having you around reardless.
Wish I’d followed this advice before that fateful ER visit…
What exactly did happen that night?
Uh, I’ve said too much. No more questions.
Thanks everyone, come back again soon!
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Everything is looking great and I’m glad the calendar is being treated as gospel as it should.
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Nice, that explains why my fists are like a bunch of bananas. I can also de-bone a whole chicken in one mouthful. That sideways bitch Eileen is swelling up fast. 
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thats a stunning lady there,goood job!!
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She walks with a weird limp but we still like her.
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Incredible update Loph!! 
Pass the bidet wand and some TP 
cause I just crapped my pants after seeing Eileen 
holy shit she is a beauty.
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Bidet wand? Here we just use a wet rag.
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That’s absolutely not true.
Nobody use the towels until further notice.
Ewww…
Yeah, just dry your hands on your pants.
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That’s not a bidet it’s one of those fancy ass washing wands!
A highly personal item I wouldn’t use at someone’s house. Only the wife’s finest towels.
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Hanging out in the laundry room, are we?
Oh, hi. Yeah, just washing the hand towels after there was some… unpleasantness.
Was-
Nah, I don’t want to get into details. I do however have something to show you. Check it out:
You grew that!?
Shocking, eh? These ones too:
Twenty seven grams. Impressive.
What? No, the scale said 28 as I was setting up the shot- honestly!
Yeah, yeah…
Wait, there was more than an ounce. What am I saying?
There was another 10g in big tasty colas, not sure why I was so shy with the camera tonight. The rest were all dense strawberry sized nugs, with maybe a handful of blueberry sized pieces chopped from the very bottom.
California strawberries, or the tasty local variety?
Local. Listen- that part doesn’t matter. My point is that I managed two and a quarter ounces this harvest.
What’s an ounce?
Come to think of it, I have no clue. We always use the metric system here, except when describing one’s height or weight.
Steak and ground beef seem to be sold by the pound but cold cuts from the deli are always sold by the gram.
And why don’t car manufacturers indicate kilometers per litre in the same way they do miles per gallon!? It’s completely non-intuitive to specify litres per 100km.
Enough already!
Er- right, sorry.
Anyways it’s been a pleasure. Thanks for stopping by!
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Looks great. Exactly 34 Kelvin worth of buds!
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